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I don't write as you know, apart from grocery lists (awesome ones, I might add), so I don't have knowledgeable input on this subject. However, what you are describing there sounds extremely similar to what a lot of the writers I most admire say when they are feeling down. So you are not deficient. This is a writing thing, feeling like this and looking at blank pages. I've looked at a lot of blank pages and felt like an idiot as a painter plenty of times